Tagged “mentalhealth”

Growing up, I recall my Dad often used the old Scots phrase mony a mickle maks a muckle and I’ve always loved it. It’s about the value of taking care of the little things because if you keep it up you get something bigger.

It’s true, and here’s a good example. Over the last six months I’ve made lots of small changes to my life and I’m feeling an overall benefit.

When chatting with a consellor in January about some bouts of low mood and mental fatigue, I described one symptom as a strange sense of disconnection. And while the recent lockdowns during the pandemic were obvious contributors to that, they didn’t feel like the full story.

I just deactivated my Twitter (X) account. Within the wider current context of other small, positive changes I’m making, it feels like the time is right.

I gave it a little thought, but not much. There were plenty of reasons to deactivate (for my own good and because X under Elon is x-crutiating) and not many good reasons to stay.

I used their download your archive feature before deactivating.

I guess I might lose a bit of touch with some web and music folks but I’m sure I’ll catch up with them in other ways.

And I s’ppose someone might try to get in touch via Twitter and find I’m no longer there, but if they want to find me online, I’m sure they will.

One less avenue for procrastination!

I found this postcard from Lockdown. (Actually it’s a post-it note however that doesn’t sound as good). It provides a record of a difficult moment. I was suffering from isolation during lockdown and the only times I was getting out was to walk a reactive dog who lost his shit in a fairly upsetting way on a regular basis. Anyway I must have felt moved to empty my thoughts on paper (not someting I do too often) either for my own sanity or to help gather my thoughts to be able to confide in someone, likely Clair.

Minimal time out of the house. Most of that’s with him. My nerves are shattered. My concentration’s broken all the time. I can feel my mental health dipping.

Of course I’m aware that this pales in comparison to challenges people on the front-line of Covid/lockdown were dealing with. And in fact, I don’t think feeling a degree of shame at expressing mental health issues will ever leave me – I know it’s not just whining, but it can feel that way. Nonetheless, it wasn’t a fun time. Just noting it before I bin the post-it.